Violence Against Women- Some books

Violence against women. When I searched my shelves for books on the topic, I found many. What is the use of reading these books? Same as reading the survivor stories. Or reading posts by experts working in the field. One can learn so much. Become aware of realities that might have seemed fantastic. True nevertheless.

The Good Women of China
Written by Xinran
Vintage, Random House.

This book comes from a country about which we really know so little. It has been just a few years now that China has opened up, and we can look into its heart. Whatever little we knew about it-we have to thank writers like Pearl S Buck whose books bring to us in vivid detail the life of common Chinese woman, and who had been banned from China for the rest of her life for having done just that...spoken about things that might be taboo.

Xinran, a radio presenter came across the stories of many women and had to interview them in her official, and sometimes in an unofficial capacity- when those women's stories cut too closely at the ruling party's ideals. In fact, as we read story after story, we realise that the government system in China and the party's ideals were a major part of the violence perpetrated against women, never mind that the picture presented to outsiders was of equality for all citizens.

In fact, Xinran openly states in her afterword, that the only reason that she could publ;ish was because it was done in the UK, and back in her country she might have been imprisoned for it.

Belonging
Written by Sameem Ali
Hachette books

Sameem is the youngest child of Pakistani immigrants to the UK. As her mother, who no longer lives with her father, is too ill to look after the child, she is taken over by a Children's agency, through which she is placed in a foster home. This, as it turns out later, was fortunate for her, as in the 6-odd years of her life, she was relatively secure, well cared for and loved- something that gave her the strength to face the incidents which later unfold.

At 6 yrs, she is taken in by her mother and the rest of the family. She feels like an alien for a long time, bewildered by everything, by the lack of warmth, lack of love, neglect, and active violence- everyone, her mother, her elder brother, her older sisters, her sister-in-law beat her up, keep her hungry, make her do work not suitable for her tender years. Sameem endures it all in the hope that one day her mother will accept her, care for her, love her in the way mothers loved their children in the books that she had been read to as a young child.

Something that is not to be. At 13yrs, she is taken to Pakistan, and married off to a much older man, and pregnant withing a few months of marriage. Since her husband wanted to have a child who is a UK citizen, she is sent back to the UK, where she delivers her baby. Later, when she is older, she runs away with a good man who loves her, marries her, and also helps her and her son to get out of the situation.

In the afterword, Sameem says that she is aware of the ground realities, that she knows she could get out of the situation with her son and make a better life for herself only because she wasn't still in Pakistan, where the laws would not be favourable to her.

In the Land of Invisible Women.
Written by Dr Qanta Ahmed
Shree Book Publishers

Dr Qanta takes up a medical post in Riyadh. She gets an unparalleled insider's view of the almost mythological medieval practices in the Saudi Kingdom. She is unusual in that she is a woman professional of Pakistani origin, born and bred in Britain, with medical education in the US. However, she soon finds out that the fact of her being a woman colours every experience in her erstwhile home. It begins at the airport on her entry into the kingdom, where a mere escort, male, sent by the hospital peremptarily takes charge of her passport and she has to cover herself up in that stifling black shroud- the abbayah- making her invisible.

As a doctor, she gets to interact with the commoners from whom her patoents come, as well as the 'intellectual glitterati' who comprise  her contemporaries. Some of whom have royal connections.

She soon realises that all we hear of the inequalities, and more, is true. Among her experiences she tells us of a female TV presenter, Rania, who is regularly beaten up by her husband- for being a famous face. She talks about women stalked by the Mutaween- religious police- who are omnipresent. She talks about how her women patients' relatives are more worried about them being veiled than about them getting the right treatment.

The dependency and helplessness of the women, even educated ones, because they cannot drive, cannot go out without a malke escort, cannot go out with a male not related to them by blood or marriage, cannot take any financial or educational decisions without the permission of males in authority, cannot be considered natural guardians of their childre. Something that was the case in another  book, Not Without my Daughter, written by Betty Mahmoody. This book chronicles Betty's escape from an abusive marriage, her fleeing with her daughter, whom she could not legally take with her under her husband's country's laws.

Behind closed doors
Domestic Violence in India
Edited by Rinki Bhattacharya
Sage Publications

This is a collection of narratives by 17 women who are survivors of domestic violence, and who have been courageously come out with their stories, not only in print, but also in the documentary film Char DiwariBoth have been made by Rinki Bhattacharya, herself a domestic violence survivor. The heartrending narratives bring home to us how widespread the problem is, and how no privilege can save a woman from a violent situation.

'Behind closed doors' are the operative words- as these incidents were believed to be in the sacrosanct family, and as such not brought out in the public. They still aren't, for the fear of social stigma. Even the apathy of the powers-that-be can be guaged by the fact that the documentary has been aired only twice, that too late at night, when its audience would not be very wide.

There are also essays by experts, feminists and workers in the field of domestic violence, who have tried to make sense of the phenomenon. How could women be marginalised like this in a country which worships the female form of Shakti, as the Goddess, or Devi? One essay argues that in certain communities, where the Devi is worshipped in the original form women still have a better position. As Sanskritisation took place, in the post-vedic period, a 'spousification' of this Devi took place, putting the husband above her, and fettering her feared unbridled sexuality. This is seen more in the upper classes, where the need for financial independence of the wife is not felt. There is also a busting of the myth that educated financially independent women do not face violence, and the reasoning behind that.

Further essays also talk about the Domestic Violence Bill and its loopholes, the introduction of a clause for 'mandatory counselling' that aims to preserve the family structure in its present form instead of redressal to the victim of violence. Police attitude towards women and their hand in the actual violence, lack of political will or even the attitude of politicians towards these issues play a big role in law-making, enforcement and any justice.

There is also a roadmap for support to victims at the end of the book. A must read for those working in the field and those seeking an understanding of and a way out of the mess.

There are so many more books that I can write about. Maybe in another post.

Images: Courtesy flipkart.com